Lately I’ve come across some strange mystical messages.. you see, all through life I’ve been on “stand by” waiting for my ‘Real’ life to start. I just needed to get to 8 stone for it to begin. I remember as far back as 17 needing just half a stone to get to my life entry and this has gone on for … well a LONG time now and I’m still waiting.. the half a stone became 1 then 2..even 3 stones to go, and then back down again to that damned 7lbs excess. But with the years also came other factors.. location being one of them. “Just As Soon As I get to my dream land my life will start..” After 5 years in my dreamland still living on “stand by” I figured maybe my life will really start when I get back to my homeland.. and get to 8 stone. Just As Soon As that day comes I will finally live instead of just exist. An ad on TV kept telling me to Live or Exist-that I had the key.. but where’s the damned lock?! I just KNOW my life is waiting to happen-one day soon I will wake up, weigh myself and I’ll be there. While I’m celebrating my ‘birth’ the phone will ring and it’ll be Dolce&Gabbana telling me they want me as their muse (although they’ve not seen me 8 stone yet but they saw the potential), then I’ll check my Facebook and, there, in front of me will be my long lost love whose been searching the world and the net for me for 10 years, who has in the meantime become a tycoon. An email will inform me that I’ve been head hunted to become the CEO of a multinational and on checking a 2 week old lottery ticket I’ll find out that I’ve won various millions. All this in the space of 15 minutes. Not to mention the red carpet of my life unfolding in front of me with every moment that passes from then on. This will happen.. I know it. Just As Soon As.. ..What I wasn’t expecting was that.. everyone else’s life is on stand by too. Everywhere I look and listen lately, people are admitting their Paused life. “Just As Soon As I get that job”.. ”Just As Soon As he calls” .. “Just As Soon As my child’s older” .. “Just As Soon As I get my insurance money” ….. If everyone’s life’s on hold-who has the remote????????????  ..Whoever you are-please PRESS PLAY!